After attending a talk on ‘Eastern Wisdom in Everyday Life’ at The School of Life the previous night, I was eager to delve into resolving my personal ‘life traps’, as I had some spiritual and mental spring cleaning to do. Hoping the second talk would involve more activity than the previous lecture, I was delighted to see a Powerpoint presentation prepared and a few activity sheets, made by the two lecturers present: a CBT therapist and a filmmaker. Both women incorporated storytelling and psychology to help the audience understand and change negative patterns in their lives. The talk covered a range of life traps: abandonment, emotional deprivation, vulnerability, defectiveness, failure, subjugation and unrelenting standards. Surely everyone can relate to falling into one of these negative patterns.
The Life Trap
The talk was perfectly organised in three stages with regular activities: recognising the life traps, understanding how they impact our daily life, and rescripting our life ‘story’ without the life traps. Before I proceed, I’ll fully explain what exactly a life trap is: a life trap is a ‘schema’ or core belief that shapes negative patterns of behaviour and influences the decisions we make. Life traps often originate from a previous experience (often from childhood) that creates the lens for the rest of your life. Schemas give us a sense of who we are but they can also lead us to fall into the same life traps.
Identifying your life trap
Understanding how it affects your life
After this School Of Life talk, I felt inspired and motivated to irradicate my life trap of ‘unrelenting standards’. So, with a bit of self-love and careful rescripting, I have found that I am more accepting of my ability and potential, I don’t expect as much of myself, I make time to relax and my stress levels have significantly decreased. Not all of your problems can be changed by listening to a talk but with a little self-help and action, you can change your life traps too!
I hope you can also gain something from the talks I attended. If you want to indulge in some food for thought or attend a talk to help you develop your emotional intelligence check out their latest classes, also visit this website to discover possible life traps you have.